Saints: Week 1 or The Shounen Power Creep

In the realm of Japanese Cartoons & Comics there is what as known as the Power Creep. The Power Creep is most common in Japanese comic books (Manga) and cartoons (Anime) aimed at young boys (Shounen). The textbook example cited most by scholars and assholes with too much time on their hands is Akira Toriyama's epic tale, Dragon Ball.

Dragon Ball is the story of a mysterious monkey boy named Goku who was raised by an old martial arts master. This weekly comic ran for over 11 years and includes such exploits as: Goku fighting desert bandits. Goku competing in martial arts tournaments. Goku fighting demons who can blow up the moon. Goku fighting super-powered androids. Goku saving entire alien civilizations. And eventually Goku takes out a deity or two.

The basic story structure is as follows: Goku gets beat up/killed. Goku gets better/resurrected. Goku trains and becomes more powerful. Goku beats up/kills whomever beat/killed him. This is the patented Shounen Power Creep™.

In week 1 of the NFL season our New Orleans Saints were set up to partake in this grand tradition by taking on the returning world champion Green Bay Packers. I seriously doubt Roger Goodell is much of a Dragon Ball fan but he couldn't have set up a more perfect situation.

Like Goku, the Saints faced a seemingly all-powerful opponent. Like Goku, the Saints fought to their last breath always staying within striking distance of victory. Like Goku, everyone counted him out after the battle.

In week 1 the Saints lost to the Packers. So far so good. The first act is now complete. Next begins the all important training story. Goku would engage in some weird and death defying training regiment. The Saints "training" will be making it through one of the tougher regular season schedules of the NFL. Sure, Goku might fall down but every time he gets up he becomes just a little stronger. The Saints will gel as the season moves forward. Ingram will become more seasoned, Shaun Rogers will get a little more used to winning, Zack Strief hones his craft as a starting offensive tackle, and Patrick Robinson becomes a quality NFL defensive back. All the while Drew Brees makes his case for a Hall of Fame bid and the rest of roster "powers up" in their own way.

After the regular season comes the playoffs. The Dragon Ball equivalent would be a Martial Arts tournament or a series of battles with the bad guy's underlings. After that Goku would beat the final boss, the person or thing that beat him and drove him to his grueling training regiment. Basically, the Saints work through the playoffs and ultimately beat the Packers in the NFC championship game. GO WITH ME ON THIS!

However, this is where the story makes it's big, but pretty predictable, plot twist! After countless casualties, painful injuries, and driven to sheer exhaustion Goku can finally breath a sign of relief and take a break. But wait. What's this?! The villain Goku defeated was nothing more than the bad guy's weaker form! After a hideous transformation the real final battle is about to begin! This is the Superb Owl! Aaron Rogers has morphed into his second form, TOM BRADY!

For those who've read this far CONGRATULATIONS! You really don't win anything except for maybe realizing I'm a huge fucking nerd. But that's ok. Why? Simple.

In the end Goku always wins. Therefore, #wegotthis.

BONUS Content - Warning: It's Stupid.